Wednesday, March 27, 2013

And so it goes......

I just spent over an hour writing out a lovely blog about my birthday weekend and all of my experiences. I saved it repeatedly and when I tried to include another picture, all of my writing was deleted somehow. How disappointing! It was a long and detailed blog about my parents visit, hiking with friends, delicious food, etc. This reminds me of the Buddhist monks who create the sand paintings and then when they are done, the entire sand mandala is destroyed! Brushed away. Thousands of colorful sand particles. Well, I suppose this post was for me and the Great Spirit to be in communication with. My goal is to blog more often to share my experiences and to write about my life. The waters have washed away what I've wrote and it is in a liminal space. Thus is life. Well, enjoy the pictures below. I took these pictures yesterday during my hike at Tilden park in the East Bay.


Friday, March 22, 2013

A Joyous Spring season to all!

It is Friday, March 22nd. The Spring Equinox was yesterday. This is the time of equal light and dark. It is the beginning of Spring. What areas of your life are you birthing anew? Today I just composted four kale plants that I planted around this time last year. Kale is an annual plant and it was past its time of harvest. One of the kale plants had gone to seed and was flowering. The pots where the tomato plants grew last year have some weeds in them. The sticks are still in the soil that had once held and supported the flourishing greens. The white string is still tied around some of the sticks that supported the once thriving tomato plants.

There are two strawberry plants that are alive and flourishing. Also, Rosemary, Sage, and Thyme are growing in the garden. I'm still not sure yet if I will plant more kale and tomatoes. I need to discern. I've been immersed in the flow of working on my thesis film, CHANGE OVER TIME. I do love to garden, to put my hands in the Earth, to touch the soil, and tend to plants. This brings me into contact with the natural world, to connect, and to tend my little plot of Earth. I do enjoy writing as well. Here I am, tapping away at the keypad writing. This is the first blog post that I have written this month! That is how busy I have been!

Yes, I've been super busy and immersed working on my thesis film, CHANGE OVER TIME. The film is coming along and I'm focusing on the post-production right now. I feel grateful and proud of myself that the film is where it currently is in the creative process. The BENEFIT EVENT that I planned for over a month was a rollicking success! I did almost all of the planning/organizing for the EVENT and it took so much energy, time, and commitment on my part! I feel so grateful and appreciative to all of my friends and community for their support and love. I felt that during the BENEFIT EVENT it was successful simply by how I was feeling. Everyone was having fun, enjoying themselves, the performances were great, it was wonderful to connect with friends and community through art and film, I felt proud of myself and honored that the EVENT was flowing so well and that I had manifested this experience! It was a rite of passage for me as an artist/filmmaker. I feel that through this EVENT I was celebrating with my friends and community my commitment and marriage to my art form. A commitment to live a creative life, to continue to make films, to make art, and to contribute my art to community! This is one aspect of my soul's purpose. To creatively express myself.

I did not simply plan the EVENT to fundraise for CHANGE OVER TIME. That was one aspect. The other aspect was to connect and engage with community. I'm grateful that so many friends and folks in my community came out to support me and my film, CHANGE OVER TIME.
I've been working on CHANGE OVER TIME for almost two years. The journey to create this film has been full of ups, downs, and all kinds of experiences and feelings in between. I feel grateful and proud of the shape and form that the film is taking. I am currently focusing on the sound design. Thinking and contemplating ways to convey emotion through sound design for the different parts of the poem, in the film.

I've been in the flow of the rushing rapids of life for a while. I feel and know it's amazing how much work I've accomplished the past few months and during my entire four years of being in graduate school. For the next two days, I will have a pause and simply be. My parents are coming up tomorrow from Clovis/Fresno to visit me in honor of my birthday. This Sunday, March 24th is my birthday. I will be thirty wonderful! Time and age is interesting.

I am still young and inhabit a beautiful, healthy body. My elder self came to me. Old man Ewan told me to slow down. To stretch out the moments. To savor life. Time can be stretched out at moments. During the BENEFIT EVENT I aimed to be present and to enjoy every moment. There were some moments that I stretched out and really savored, like eating a delicious bite of food slowly and deliberately. I have been slowing down, yet actively working and very, very focused. It helps me to light a candle and to write my intentions on a piece of paper that I tape to a candle. Then I light the candle on my alter and this is one aid to support me in my work and with focusing on the task at hand. This has been helpful for me during this time of work, work, work, and being super focused so that I can graduate with my MFA in Cinema at the end of the Spring Semester.

I feel that I usually move slowly in life and that my natural pace in life gets usurped at times by the rushing pace of industrial society. I do my best to work, live, and be at my natural pace as much as possible. Through being, living, and working at my natural pace I do get everything that I need to do done in a sustainable pace/rhythm of time. I simply work intuitively and trust my body and core in regards to when I need to do what. This internal structure and rhythm works for me in regards to how I choose to co-create, sculpt, and build my life. Yes, my Elder Ewan self came to me and I listened to him. The body never lies, neither do the emotions. If I listen to my body and my emotions, I can readily hear the wisdom that is expressing itself. A wise person heeds the wisdom of their body and emotions.

Who knows what being 31 has in store for me? I envision a successfully created, finished film of CHANGE OVER TIME! I simply keep getting older in regards to temporal time. Yet, I feel ageless at moments. My essence is a timeless being of love and light. I am Ewan and I will be 31 this Sunday! Wow! Life simply keeps flowing. There is never a dull moment in life for those who are awake, aware, conscious, and on their paths of personal growth!

May we all enjoy the Springtime and be aware of the areas of our life to compost, to release and the areas of our lives to nourish, grow, and tend! So mote it be!

A joyous Spring season to all!

Light and gratitude,